~sheesh! its been a while again, since i last posted an entry... and nakatiwangwang nlng ung last entry sa site.. hahaha.. eniwei, today's sunday and tomorrow, malamang monday na!! orientation ko na sa st.scho tom.. =) actually, its a four-day orientation... i just wonder why they made it as a four-day event, eh pede namang 1-day lng.. oh wellz.. im kinda excited because, again, may baon nako!!! =) harhar..
~just wish me luck! sana may makita akong cute na lasallian.. ahaha.. joke lng.. wala sa isip ko mga bagay na yan!! (wochus! kunwari pa!! hahaha.. ^_^)
~just watch out for my new layout... im working on it.. mas maganda, (i hope) hehehe.. love you all.. mwah!! miss you friends... =(
~im Outy!!!

~i can't help but cry.. i have too much burdens in my life, yet, i still bother to be concern to friends whom i really care.. khit na nababaliwala lng ako... it's okay though.. whatever path they took, those were their choices... d nlng ako makikielam! i just hope and pray.. that things will get better for them...
~bat ganun noh? sadyang ang gulo ng mundo.. dahil naren sa magugulong tao.. minsan, nagagago ka na.. cge, tuloy padin.. papaka-tanga, papakabobo.. hanggang sa huli nlng magsisisi... tas bat kaia naaatim ng iba na manggago harap harapan?... trying to help ka na sakanila.. kaw pa napapasama.. as kaibigan, u unintentionally, make sermon at times dba? pero.. ang dating pa, nangaaway ka.. haaay ewaan.. magulo nga talaga.. -,-
~i dont wanna write more of this kinda things na.. its breaking my heart to see and encounter friends "kuno" na ganito.. basta i will never interfere na!!..
~haaay..
~as to my true friends... i miss you guyz.. i know, kayo lng lagi nagpapasaya sakin and nakakaintindi.. i miss you guys big time.. and im excited sa pagpunta kina A on 28...see you there..!! :)

~putanginang shit pare!! i was fuckin basag kagabi.. i went to the opening of mark sunga and company's gym.. went there kasabay c kenken around 830pm yata.. we were on da roof top.. andun cna amiel (kaso umalis agad), mark sunga, bryan ona, julie, kenken, jc cabreira, joseph, george, erik, ung isa pang mark, and jeboy.. drank mga ilang shots ng vodka.. didnt drink beer kce mahina ako sa beer tlga.. not unless super trip ko talaga na uminom or somethin..

~after a while, sabi ko kay kenken, trip na namin ung dala nyang stuff.. which was in a glass tube.. and fuck mhen! one hitz lng, basag nako.. i thought it was da stuff pero it was da pipe pala.. well, i dunno.. ken just told me na it was da pipe eh.. pero mannn, it was good shit!! though super d ko na kaia kagabi, its like i wanna lay down and sleep na.. or laugh til i drop.. hahaha!!! kept on fighting da dizziness and highness (lol, may word ba na ganon?)... pero as in d ko na talaga kaia.. so i told them, i'll go ahead na..

~just worried i might not get home safe coz of my condition, but thank God, i was home @ my besh's house safe and sound.. oh well, if dat was not da situation kagabi, probably nandun pako til matapos ung inuman.. next tym nlng ako papaka-high ng todo.. haha!! laugh on and get high biatch!! :)

~im Outy!!!

~yesterday was a terrible day for my mom and my ninang.. as you all know, we have a bakery somewhere around equitable village, talon, lp city.. and with just an overheated electric fan in a day care center near our bakery, a big fire ruined the lives of hundreds of people... almost 150 houses were destroyed because of the fire.. while firemen were putting the fire off, my mom, ninang and their "panaderos" went off trying to save some of the important stuff da bakery has.. like slicer, refrigarator, money, etc.. they sorta evacuated da bakery and went to bf resort, (since there is a passage ata from their place to bfrv...) eniwei, to avoid some robbery, they managed to close da bakery muna... after a few hours, the fire was off.. luckily, it stopped before it reaches our bakery.. two big gasoline tanks are in our bakery kce, so if it reaches there.. big explosion will occur.. yikes!

~i feel bad, coz lotsa lives were destroyed.. but, i also feel lucky for my mom and ninang.. that nuthin happened to them and to our business.. oh well.. life must go on.. so mom and ninang were again in da bakery.. they'll try to help most expecially to people who needs food.. :)

~speaking of fire, i hate dis month! as in totally!! last week, i was caught up in da rain.. to think na its summer! haller? tas suddenly, it'll be hot na naman coz of da sun.. geesh! my nose bleeded yesterday.. and last night naman, i had a fever.. tas i have cough and colds pa.. add it up with a very hot summer day!! diba?? my hair is dry, im sick, im in terrible heat, and im freakin thirsty!! hay nako.. i just hate dis month.. roar!! >:|

~its like i wanna stay inside da freezer nalang.. hahaha.. i just hope d naman ako manigas or sumthin.. lol.. eniwei, havta go.. :)

~im Outy!!!

~Yesterday was a tiring day.. so i slept a little early. around 230am, a feeling of irritation woke me up.. On the bed, with the lights off, i suddenly cried.. WEIRD, but yeah, i cried.. why? i don't know.. I just felt unsecured and worthless.. eventhough i was in my room and in darkness.. i felt like the world was moving very fast.. everything circling around like anything would just hit me or something.. my tears kept flowing out my eyes.. but why?? was it because of sadness? but how could that be? if i am not? GEESH!! my heart was like tearing apart.. i felt the hurt deep inside, and made me catch my breath.. ARGH!! i hate that feeling.. i really do.. :(

~until now, i still don't know that happened.. i cried without knowing why.. whatever that was... or whatever will happen.. i just pray that He will help me and guide me so that i'll be able to surpass this.. God will never leave me.. He loves me.. I know it.. Ü

~in my sleep tonight, i will bury the fears and loneliness in the depths of unknown darkness and misery.. and may the bright morning give me hope and strength to stand and face the wonderful things ahead.. :)

~im Outy!!!

~"The first step to getting the things you want out of life is this: Decide what you want."-- there are things, lotsa things i want in life.. goals i aim to achieve and dreams i like to reach.. the problem is, i have an ephemeral mind.. i tend to change my decisions often.. i am trying to adjust with this kind of personality.. and rather, decide firmly and surely in what im suppose to do or say.. i have flustered lotsa people coz of my fickle mind.. and i am sorry..

~"Life is full of misery, loneliness, and suffering - and it's all over much too soon."--we have been living in this life full of pain and agony.. yes, its true.. but, somehow, this quote struck me too.. "Be open to your dreams, people. Embrace that distant shore. Because our mortal journey is over all too soon."life is full of shit, but we must not forget the life, the beautiful life, given to us by our loving Father.. with life itself are packed with joy, love and hope which we should embrace and taken care of during our mortal life. we are brought here on earth to give love and care to da things He created.. only death will prove that we have fulfilled God's will and we are far more ready to be with Him eternally.. :)


:::C..O..N..T..I..N..U..A..T..I..O..N!! (april 27,2005 Wednesday):::


~"If you do not wish to be prone to anger, do not feed the habit; give it nothing which may tend to its increase."-- i tend to be wrahful at times.. mood swings, anyone? haha! my mom usually tease me by telling me na HIGHBLOOD daw ako.. hahaha!! true or not, i really should be controlling my anger, you know.. :) there are times when small things get big, coz of my temper.. haha.. so bad!! >:| oh well, anger will make me look old and ugly, so i better control it.. MASISIRA ANG FACE VALUE noh!! ahaha!!

~"If there is one thing worse than being an ugly duckling in a house of swans, it's having the swans pretend there's no difference."-- every person living in this world is unique and different.. some personalities, images, attitudes and movements of a person may be the same with others, but fully, they're different.. :) i used to compare myself to other people.. she's more talented, smarter or prettier.. but, those stuff just makes me think im a LOSER or whatever.. then, i realized why should i compare myself to others? eh i have my own talents and why not share it to others?, i have a brain and why not use it, i have a beautiful face which God gave me..and not just a beautiful face.. i also have a good heart to love and care for others.. :)

~"It's choice - not chance - that determines your destiny."-- in our life, we sometimes take chances.. but also, we should always have to make a choice.. 'coz our destiny may depend on what choice or path we will choose or take..

~"One of the greatest victories you can gain over someone is to beat him at politeness."-- BE SPORT!!we always hear that usually, if there are contests, games or competitions.. yeah, it applies to everyone.. not just on games or competitions.. but also with life.. no one in dis world experiences ONLY good things in life.. each one would fall or fail.. but, standing up and fighting to our best would make us all winners! :) we should live life to da fullest...... do our best, make da best out of it and be da best we can be.. :) emme right or right? hehehe..

~enough with the entry now.. more next time ayt? eniwei, congratulate me guys.. we won yesterday.. volleyball game.. 2 sets lng and we won na.. :) victory's rising.. but hey, if we lose? its no big deal.. atleast we did our best and we played fairly.. :) its enough for us to be winners.. :)

~im Outy!!!

~hmmm.. i know for myself that i have hurt people in my past.. recently lng or way back wen i was younger pa talaga.. probably because of being immature, selfish, and inconsiderate.. now, i can't say that i'm mature na, or anything.. all i can say is, i am more open to facts that may or may not happen in the future and to what other people might think or feel.. also that i am more aware of it than before..

~why am i saying these? hmm, few days ago, i have been lecturing or let's say i have been giving an advice to a friend about his situation.. there was this girl who he was courting.. she was sweet, adorable and charming like they have said.. one of those days, this girl confessed to my friend her love she has for him.. but, (take note ha) after those heavy words she said, in a few days time, she left him, not actually with goodbyes, but with words that broke my friend's heart.. kumbaga.. BUSTED with matching LAME REASONS!!!! ok fine.. that's normal.. actually, the same thing happened to me too.. and i am really sorry for that.. anyway.. as i said, that's normal.. but, the worse here is, those same things happened twice or thrice pa nga ata.. i mean, both person we're still involved... and that's too much dba??

~ok, let me get back to wat i said bout LAME REASONS.. what are those lame reasons im talkin about? kce its like this.. if we really dont like that person.. why not tell them right to the point dba? but, if we really like them.. or love them, y not fight for it.. not to the point na, we'll look stupid ha!! wat i mean is, y give some stupid reasons like for example,

****KASI UNG FAMILY KO, ANG GUSTO, UNG EXBOYFRIEND KO..
****NAGMAMAKAAWA SAKIN C GANITO NA WAG KO CYA IWAN..
****HMM.. ANG DAMI NATING PAGKAKAIBA, MAS BAGAY KAYO NI GANYAN.........

now, tell me if those were lame or not.. hmmm.. la lang.. im not in da position to give these kind of judgements or what.. but, we have a freewill naman, to let our voice to be heard dba?? can you hear me out loud ba??!?! ahahahaha!!! kiddin!!

~anyway, in my case, i dont know if its lame or not.. the truth is, right now, AYOKO PA MAGKABOYFRIEND..!!! y? im not yet ready for commitments, for heartbreaks, for kamartyran, for cries, for headaches and everything na included in having a boyfriend.. im simply enjoying what i am now.. ngaun kung may kontra kayo... la nako pakielam dun.. bsta, i told you guys da truth.. and that's it!! :) pero i love you all!! as friends.. weee.. ahahaha.. la lang.. i just hope, u know what i mean with my entry...ayt? mwah!

~im Outy!!!